Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Homeleave Midpoint--Watersports and Family Reunions


Out of Africa—a blue bellied roller, native of West Africa that we saw in the Baltimore Zoo this past week.


I would have liked to have started writing a bit earlier in the vacation to keep fresh in my mind the first impressions I have garnered from being back in the US again after another year away. 

One of the clear warnings I have read in at least one ‘re-entry resource’ is a reminder that it is not only us that change as a result of living overseas, but that the culture at ‘home’ is not stagnant and moves as well.  It is a mistake to come back and think that things here are basically the same, so I try to stay tuned not only to my changes in perception, but in movements in the culture as well.

A personal perspective that is echoed by my children's impressions as well, is the amazing cleanliness and openness that is evident here even as we drive from the airport.  The trees along the interstate are varied and twice the height of any we see in Burundi.  It is a relief to not see hectare upon hectare of eucalyptus. 

Even more striking is the sheer nakedness of homesteads here.  We drive through neighborhoods to Rebecca’s parents’ house and pass houses, farms, shopping centers, all open for public viewing.  There are no walls here!  Or at least the walls that exist are invisible to the eye.  This particularly impresses David and Oren who live most of their lives in Burundi behind the 10 foot walls of a school yard, or our own cloister which encloses a house and a small surrounding yard with almost no view of the world beyond for a short child.  I have no idea of what other houses in our neighborhood in Bujumbura look like.  Some have a second floor that sticks up higher than the wall, and others take care to have decorative brickwork and some gardening around the outside of the enclosure, but by and large we live hidden from each other in Burundi. 

The kids love to run around outside here and prefer it to being inside the house.  I am amazed that they can play outside on the lawn all day, and not come home dirty!  It is like there is no exposed dirt here, it is all soft grass, and clean asphalt.  We almost don't need to bathe them!   In Burundi lawns are a luxury and shoolyards, playgrounds, are all carpeted with dirt, not grass.  There is no smell of burning in the air here, no large crowds walking down the roads, and best of all, we have a brief respite of blessed anonymity.  We are not a public spectacle here when we walk around, shop, drive, or otherwise emerge from behind our wall --No staring or surprised exclamations of Muzungu!  

I am not used to people knowing how to line-up anymore.  I was very anxious, standing in line at a store as the mother and child in front of me left nearly a 3 foot gap between themselves and the person in front of them.  But no one even thought about jumping into the gap, much less cut to the front of the line upon arrival.  

I am surprised about driving.  On the one hand, the sense of order and respect for the law is a welcome change, but people drive much faster here on the highways.  I am not used to being able to drive much over 45mph anywhere because of road conditions and traffic.  Ironically the highways here seem more dangerous to me now than the treacherous drive along the winding route upcountry in Burundi.

 There are other changes here that I have noticed.  I spoke last summer about the sense of self-reliance here that has become a cultural principle to the point of near absurdity.  One can do just about anything without ever contacting another human being.  Buying gas, renting videos, grocery shopping, getting directions, shopping, can all be done without ever contacting another human being.  The automation, a part of the advance in information technology has advanced significantly since we left.  I am amazed at what one can do with the help of a smart phone or an ipad.   As much as Burundi has moved a bit into this world through cell phone technology, I cannot see it becoming a predominately ‘virtual’ culture for many years, if ever.  Real human relationships are the basis of all meaningful interaction there.

All that said, it has been great being back with our families.  We did find that our kids had a fabulous time with their grandparents.  Oren loved the time with Rebecca’s parents where he spent much of it harvesting the fruit that grows on their property—raspberries, blueberries, blackberries, and apples.  He also made numerous trips to the library and has improved his English language reading considerably. 

David enjoyed the stay at my parents’ house although he took quite a while to get over jetlag and enjoyed more than a few 2am breakfasts before getting into the rhythm.

We came back and spent the first week with Rebecca’s family at their home in Fallston MD.  We had a lot of important business to take care of right off involving dentists and doctors, in preparation for another year abroad.  We also shopped for new shoes and clothes and other necessities for the year ahead. 

We did take in some of the sights of Baltimore as well.  We went to the zoo with Rebecca’s Mom one day, and the train museum the next day with her Dad.  These are favorite venues for our kids and they know them from past home-leaves.  They race ahead to see their favorite sights in each.  It was interesting to note that the animals in the safari exhibit seemed less impressive having just seen them the previous month in the wild and at times up closer.

We have been to several pools and also made a trip to the Gunpowder river where the kids like to wade and ride on their butts down some small rapids.  Visiting some favorite playgrounds was also on the agenda as well as catching up with a few friends who live closer to Rebecca’s parents.

The weather has been unseasonably cold after the first day of our arrival and several evenings we enjoyed going into the hot tub on Dave and Jean’s (Rebecca’s parents) deck.  This is a bit surprising since we often find the weather in the summer much hotter than in Burundi. 

After our first week in the US in Baltimore, where we did accomplish most of the tasks we set out to do, we prepared to leave for a week in Kansas City, Missouri to attend a large family reunion on my side of the family.  To be precise, it was a reunion of the son and daughters of my maternal grandmother (Ruth Hawkins) as well as their children and grandchildren. 

It was a special group of people because my mother’s family was close and the 3 sisters and brother often got together in summers on my grandparents’ farm in Cherokee, Oklahoma when I was young.  I remember many summers, coming back from overseas to spend several weeks with a dozen cousins at my grandmother’s house where we would stay nights together in their dorm style basement, and spend the days on the farm helping my uncle with the work there was to do.   (One of the favorite tasks was driving heavy equipment such as tractors for plowing, discing, springtoothing.)

The last time we got together in this particular grouping more than 10 years ago.  My grandmother has passed away but the family connections remain.  We chose to meet at one of my Aunt’s houses this year and it was amazing to see all of the cousin’s children playing together in much the same way we as cousins did when we were young.

It was great to catch up with cousins and Aunts and Uncles from all branches of the family.  The Calavans, Pearces, Mosleys and Hawkins’ were all represented and we had a great time visiting, playing Frisbee golf, fishing, singing, playing guitar, and worshiping together. 

One of my cousins’ wives had done some research on our lineage and found some very interesting, albeit troubling aspects of our background.  We are in fact descended from a long line of sailors, who worked for the Crown of England since Elizabeth 1.  Among the notables were Sir John Hawkins, an Admiral, who was known for his ferocious piracy against the Portugese and Spanish.  (He was a professional pirate!)  He was also heavily involved in the slave trade in Jamaica as were many of his descendants.  Sir Frances Drake, whose mother was a Hawkins is also in our line, which I found interesting as well. 

Southern Comfort: Enjoying a family favorite--
biscuits and sausage gravy.
Saturday evening and Sunday morning were particularly meaningful.  On Saturday my brother Jonathan and cousins Brad and Brian played some jazz guitar together.  They were very impressive.  Afterwards some of the Aunts and Uncles shared with us the memories of growing up in the family of Clarence and Ruth Hawkins.  They were remembered over and over again for their sacrificial generosity and their work ethic, both of which they instilled in their children.

Among the interesting conversations we had on Saturday that related our work directly to the experience of my agriculturalist relatives was talking about the fields around my Aunt’s house.  My brother commented that he was surprised that the wheat chaff had not been plowed under at this time in the year as we used to see when we were young.  My uncle explained that they no longer till the soil, but have a seed drill that can plant the wheat right into the untilled field.  It is the same conservation agriculture technique, on a mechanized scale, that we are teaching small scale farmers about in Burundi.  I was really quite surprised to see that conservation agriculture was largely in practice here in the US even on very large farms. 

On Sunday morning we worshipped together on the back porch of Binnie and Bill’s house.  We sung songs and my cousin Brad Pearce and I were invited to share a message with the group.  I was very happy to do so, especially in light of the fact that this side of my family also has a heritage of Mennonites and Brethren in their line (my Grandmother was a Hiebert) and now I am working for the Mennonite Central Committee.  It was nice to reflect back the Mennonite values we work under in MCC to them, particularly since one of my great Uncle’s, the late PC Hiebert was one of MCC’s founding members in the early 1900s.  The Gospel, expressed through deeds of sacrificial service and hospitality has always been a family value for the Hawkins-Hiebert family.

I did take the opportunity to use the story of Moses’ last look at the Promised Land from Mt. Nebo before his death as recorded in Deuteronomy 34.  Moses had brought his people over 40 years right to the edge of the Promised Land but was told by God that he himself would not lead them on. 

I talked about how Moses might have felt about that and concluded that he was probably joyfully content because he knew that God had promised the best for the next generation, not his own.  I made the point that the Bible is always pointing optimistically at the future.  To be a person of faith is to have a hope that the future will be better than the present and that God reserves the best for next generation. 

The originals:  Binnie, Lonnie, Arlene, Bunny
I used this as a take off point to talk about the challenge of overcoming fatalism in Burundi where poverty robs people of a hope in the future and the theology is one of a helpless trusting of God, with no agency by people to say, plan for the education of one’s children.  (That is God’s problem to take care of them, not mine.)  I talked about our work with farmers groups on encouraging them to save and setting up village savings and loan associations.  I emphasized though, that without the hope the future would be better than the present, no amount of work by us will change anything.  Poverty is a spiritual issue and change requires a belief that offers a hope for a better future.

I compared it to our own culture in which we suffer a similar malady but it is more nihilistic than fatalistic.  We do have wealth that gives us security, but we often embrace a theology that claims “God wants the best for me now.”  Many of us live here in great debt, as we have borrowed from the future for the sake of making the present the Promised Land, even at great risk to the future we will leave.

Both theologies miss the real profound optimism expressed in the Bible, that assures us that the present is a time of suffering through which we will pass, but the future is the promise of glory, for us, for our children, for all creation. 

I think it was well received and Brad followed by talking about his work over many years with Young Life and connected to the idea that most of the kids he works with are seeking reliable adults who can assure them that their future will be better than the present where some (especially in the innercity) are suffering greatly in the face of parents in prison, divorced, or otherwise absent.

It was good to see the generation of our children there, and the generation of my parents.  The time together reminded me so much of the times when we were young, only we were now the Aunt’s and Uncles and our parents are now the grandparents.  I do have a hope that the Promised Land will belong to those who come after us, and that they can share that hope with their children as well.

My apologies for missing anyone, but I want to thank especially: Lon and Karen, Binnie and Bill, Arlene and Wayman, Bunny and Henry, Brian and Lonnie, Brad and Sue, Mark and Kay, Linda, Cindy, Beth and Matt, Christine, Jonathan and Emma, (and Rebecca) and all the young cousins.  I love you all, and I hope we can do this again sometime.

1 comment:

Chris B said...

Paul, I echo your observations upon returning to the USA. We also lived in a walled in house... along with everyone else in the neighborhood. And I still get a little nervous when there is a gap in the line! I am driving normally now but it did take quite a while until I could drive at speed and without anxiety. I am so used to watching out for holes, people, and livestock in the road, not to mention other drivers on MY SIDE!
Chris Ballard